Clearing my head
Nov 24th, 2008 Posted in Diary Entry | no comment »well i didnt want to post this on fame forums, as i didnt want everyone on there to see this…aghh time to clear my head.
ok this is really complex and stupid. i should move on, i have a life and i shouldnt care about this but i have an essay to do and i can’t do it because i cant think straight, so here i am writing this.
about a month ago there was this problem with some guy who wanted a signature. i made him a signature, and he didn’t keep his end of the deal. i contacted various moderators about the issue in hope that they can help me negotiate and sort out the problem (since i’m just a regular user on the forum, i can’t really inforce anything on anyone, and this sort of thing usually sorts itself out, but with this guy it didnt.) so various people got involved and i chose my words carefuly not to imply a ban, but i didn’t want that guy to use my signature anymore. all i wanted was justice, the guy couldn’t keep my signature, i worked hard for it, and actually spent time to edit it, and i fully held my end of the deal. it was completely unjustified that he used the signature and did not hold his end of the deal. i am very patient as you may know, but when i see a crash landing i act quickly, and try to prevent it.
anyways, back to the present. there was a moderator position open to the public, and after thinking through all the possibilities of getting the job, i actually bothered and submitted an application (which i am still kicking my self for since i should not be playing flyff!!!), and the deadline passed, and the moderators were announced. part of me somewhere wanted this position, and well the other part didnt. i am somewhat relieved i didn’t get the job, but when i asked for feedback regarding my application, it just streamed alot of questions in my head (thats why i cant concentrate on my essay).
the reason for the decline of my application seemed to involve around that single guy (who eventually got banned ~ no idea why and i don’t really care either) who i contacted the moderators about. now if it was up to me, i would not hold grudges, forgive and forget. but there was one moderator who when i had initially contacted regarding the whole situation (in the past story) had the nerves to swear, be horrible and act completely unprofessional towards me. again what can i do? maybe the moderator had a bad day? i didn’t give much thought into it, the situation was dealt with and justice was served. i was neither happy nor sad, and frankly i avoided any contact with this sad and aggressive mod (would you want another random slap in the face? no). so yeah, i didn’t get picked because of that incident. now i’m just thinking how unfair it was to base all my contribution to the forums on that single event. i had no control over the issue and it simply spiralled out of control.
at the same time i’m just thinking this whole experience is just another stone in the road to something even greater. firstly because i was not fully convinced about applying for moderator, and secondly this website is a disgrace compared to what i planned for it!!! so yeah, i need to concentrate more on work and making this place even better. i’ve had so many requests for soo many things i haven’t been keeping up at all! on fame, my request list is going to take a whole day to clear (meaning no sleep) and i got more work for the islamic society here at university, and i have 2 deadline to essays that HAVE to be handed in asap or i will die a horrible death, sainsbury’s work at the dreadful 6am start of day on saturdays which i have to wake up for at 5am have a quick breakfast and cycle up a hill to reach the damn place, and here it comes….grocery shopping (of doom) /facepalm, i need a car!
‘and i think to myself…what a wonderful world’…time for a break.
